The number one killer of any relationship is a lack of healthy expectations. Unreasonable relationship expectations are the easiest to create because they are ideal rather than realistic. You believe you can get whatever you want. You will not have a good relationship simply because you made a wish. It's important to understand that mismatched expectations lead to conflict. That's why it's important to set healthy expectations. You and your partner both deserve to expect dignity and respect, intimacy and passion, and unwavering love and support. These are the type of healthy expectations you need to set in a relationship rather than unreasonable ones.
Unrealistic expectations include expecting your partner to change their values, be the source of all your happiness, or act contrary to their personality. You should not expect your partner to react or feel the same way that you do. Here are a few ways to set healthy expectations:
Before setting expectations, start by discovering your boundaries; ask yourself and your partner what you need. Respect from both sides is essential in healthy relationships. Compassion, understanding, and respect for each other's boundaries are the best ways to communicate your expectations with your partner. Respecting each other when you communicate will make your relationship healthier and stronger in the long run.
Compassion is at the top of the list of things you need to expect in a relationship. To navigate any relationship successfully, you must demonstrate compassion by prioritizing your love over your expectations. As important as learning how to manage expectations in a relationship is, keep in mind that expectations exist to keep the relationship on the right track. At the end of the day, your collaboration is most important.
Sometimes, people set unreasonable expectations in a relationship, such as thinking that they would understand what they want if their partners truly loved them. Because it is based on an incorrect assumption, this unreasonable expectation repeatedly sets you up for relationship disasters. Assuming your partner will understand your hints is a mistake. That's when you need to stop making assumptions and discuss your expectations openly and honestly.
There are no rules for having expectations because they differ from person to person. Expectations are neither right nor wrong; they are simply ideas we've developed over time about how relationships should function. It is critical to understand your expectations to communicate them at the appropriate time. When an expectation is not met, it is common for a discussion to ensue. Therefore, it's best to be clear about what you expect from your partner in order to avoid future problems.
Instead of focusing on the negative, make an effort to appreciate your partner's excellent characteristics. This will take your relationship a long way. They may not have kept the dishes the way you intended them to, but they did their fair share by washing them. And perhaps they walked the dog because you had a long day at work. There is always something to appreciate if you pay attention.
Building a strong partnership and defining expectations takes time and effort, but it is worth it once you make an effort. Remember, it's the small things that matter. Master the art of setting healthy expectations with our counselors – your gateway to a strong and healthy relationship!